A friend asked me today - 'what are your thoughts on life...soon we'll be middle aged women...enjoying and living, is this what life is all about?. I myself ponder on this every now then not because I dont have a purpose but because may be I have more time to think about the purpose or lack of it.
It's no wonder that so many people seek refuge from themselves in endless distractions, mind-numbing addictions and mindless philosophies. They are running away from the realization that their lives have no purpose. The horrible truth is that a life without a defined purpose is a life of no purpose; and a life of no purpose is no life at all. It is merely an existence, an existential wasteland.
How do you get a life of purpose and meaning? You make it up. That's right. You just decide. What do you love? What do you desire? What makes you happy? So I took a pen and paper and started jotting down my happiest moments in life, when was it that i was very happy and what was different in that situation which made me so happy.Similarly for desires. What do i desire to achieve/ do in this lifetime?
It does not have to be a life long commitment. Chances are, your ideals and desires will evolve over time, as you grow, and so, your personal purpose will also change or evolve. Most people have is that they look to some outside force to supply the purpose of their life, like society or religion. Even thats not a bad idea.
After jotting down I realised that I am happy when -
1) I am the best around, the centre of all attention
2) I am surrounded by like-minded friends
3) I do something creative and new
4) I learn , explore and experience new things
5) I am physically healthy and attractive.
And how do to I create such situations. What do I do create such situations? So I derived my action plan from these and break it up into years , months and days.
FOR SELF
1) Do some physical exercise everyday ( dancing/ pranayama/ yoga/ brisk walk)
2) Value add yourself with topics related to work (read abt banking and finance in SBI, India or world in general, be updated, look for new interests, hone your existing skills and improve what u r weak at e.g. stock mkt)
3) Keep up with your existing hobby (for me thats writing, listening to new music, dancing - new styles like salsa, belly dance etc., cooking - learn fron recipes from the net, diarise it)
4) Develop new ones(am interested in pottery and mosaic art... lets see when i do that)
5) Think, ponder, meditate OR read things which make you think, make you grow, dont stagnate...grow
6) Keep positive thoughts, keep smiling, overcome your weaknesses
7) Look good - buy/do things to make you look/feel beautiful
8) Keep trying something new. Innovate at work, at home.
FOR OTHERS (doing for others gives more meaning to your existance than doing for self)
1) Keep in touch with old friends, add more value to the friendships
2) Maintain and cherish personal relations e.g. parents, cousins, uncles, aunts - call them up, talk to them
3) Engage in volunteering activities. Do something for others, the less fotunate, for the society.
This is what it is for me at the moment, as a single. It would have been different were I at home or if I were married or if I were at some other place, some other job some other stage of life. So keep evolving.
So here is a little hint as to how to live a purposeful life while you are awaiting that grand purpose...
Do each thing each day with a specific purpose. Ask yourself constantly...
"why am I doing this? to what end? what is the purpose of this action? what is my intent in doing this thing?"
Once you begin to act intentionally throughout each day, you will soon discover that each day has purpose and meaning. Days become meaningful weeks; weeks become meaningful years; years become meaningful lives. It is your conscious choice in THIS moment to live, think, believe and act 'on purpose' that will create a purposeful life.
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